At first glance, you will notice a well dressed woman somewhat unsettled, leaning against the bar with a glass of wine. Though she finds herself within a female surrounding, her lack of the unexplainable floats above her head. We can immediately suss out that she’s a married woman.
We all love to have a bite of the forbidden fruit but is this married woman the snake in the Garden of Eden ? I needed first insight into this world and decided to interview a friend who journeyed through this unfortunate experience.
Gia is a passionate and caring individual who has a bomb of loving emotions waiting to explode inside her. She’s the type of woman who would put her coat over a puddle so that you wouldn’t have to skip on to the pavement. She’s been single for some time and it is not by choice but she hadn’t found that emotional passionate rawness a woman had to offer until she met Sarah. Sarah was a married woman who had not only been committed for the last 20 years but had two children. Oblivious to Sarah’s situation, Gia was besotted with her new found friend. After a couple of dates, Gia committed to being the woman on the side. The issue I bear with this situation and which so many of us are aware, is the possible consequence that affairs do not carry a fairytale ending. Gia was left carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders one afternoon sitting in her bedroom. The thoughts of one year of discussing their future plans together had turned into what Gia had dreaded: She was used. Heterosexual married women do not randomly walk into a lesbian bar and decide that they want a night of passion. They find themselves in Soho because of unhappy marriages and a loss of self worth and self respect. They come to find female warmth, compassion and love. Sarah’s husband was mentally abusive and had torn the seed of hope and happiness she once bore. Her mission though of despair or curiosity turned into draining Gia to rebuild herself. Selfishness was never a secret but Gia fell head over heels for a woman who would have her one rainy day in November sitting on her bed contemplating suicide. Gia gifted Sarah with completeness and rebuilt her confidence, self worth, self respect and gave her hope. Gia was no longer of use and Sarah would not return the responsibility of caring for the woman who planned to marry her and to raise her children. Months of demanding that Sarah’s leaves her husband had pressurised the relationship and Sarah’s lack of consideration for Gia led to their break-up. Gia had no choice but to end the marital affair. I wish I could tell you that Sarah suffered emotionally but unfortunately not… She found her way back into her marital bed and left Gia to save what very little she had left.
I can picture many of you judging Gia for either committing an immoral act or for not being realistic in what the possible outcome would entail. We can judge her as much as we care to do so but at the end of the day we would most probably have followed in Gia’s footsteps. We all long for love and love is the choice of weapon so many use for personal gain. Married women who lurk in the shadows are to be considered as the snakes in the Garden of Eden. Sooner or later you will find yourself emotionally broken and longing for a woman who will have long forgotten you. Lesbians are used as emotional cushions by heterosexual women who know how to pull on our heart strings. Bear in mind that one year of passion is not worth that ten second moment of contemplating suicide. You cannot change someone so don’t believe that you hold that magical power. Sooner or later we all find ourselves in the same boat.