love ‣ The Gayly Mirror

14Jun

By alcoachNo Comments

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Love is way more than just a feeling

Psychologists call it drive, that motivational impulse that makes us feel and do better, with one main goal: spending as much time as possible with the one we are in love with. You see him, you like him, he likes you back. He smiles at you and you at him - timidly or nervously, it makes no difference. He comes closer and starts chatting with you. You guys decide to go to his place, or yours - again, it makes no difference. Once at home, in a second, you both stare at each other's eyes, start kissing, take off your clothes, and... boom! You find yourself naked, having the most amazing sex of your life. Surprisingly, he knows what you are craving for and how to give it to you. He knows what you like, although he doesn't know you at all. It looks and feels like a spell, but it's real. It's h...

I love you, I want you, but I want to change you

31May

By alcoachNo Comments

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I love you, I want you, but I want to change you

It is the main feature of fatuous love - lots of passion and good intentions but no real stability that comes from true and deep intimacy. The bad habit of wanting to change the person you say you're in love with, turn them into someone they are not, and fix their shortcomings is not love. It is a lack of respect towards the person you're supposed to like, not to change. Psychology calls it fatuous love, that is the kind of relationship where one of the two wants the other to embody a particular ideal of man/woman. If this is your case, let me tell you something you may not be aware of. You are not in love with a person. You are in love with an ideal lover. But what's ideal is never real because reality is never flawless. When your partner changes just because you tell them so, they...

SEX TOY OF THE MONTH: THE DOUBLE PLEASER

30May

By Roberta MooreNo Comments

closeUp, Health, Lifestyle

SEX TOY OF THE MONTH: THE DOUBLE PLEASER

We must not be ashamed of exploring our sexuality. We have all endured the strap-on phase. But this is the strap-on of the century ! At 6 inches long and only 5 inches of insertable pleasure it strikes a woman’s G-spot just right. I have spent years searching for the Holy Grail of toys and here she is ! At £24.99 with free delivery Harmony have created the perfect gift either for you or your partner. The dildo is not too soft but firm enough to not slip out or snap when carrying out certain positions. We know far too well of those awkward moments when the dildo slips out aggressively, hurting our vaginas and causing us to no longer want to persevere. This strap-on initially frightened me as do most sex toys but I cannot keep running away. Without my partner knowing, I took one fo...

Passion, Intimacy, Commitment: the three main components of love (according to science)

27May

By alcoachNo Comments

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Passion, Intimacy, Commitment: the three main components of love (according to science)

American psychologist Robert Sternberg states that happy and healthy love relationships are based on these three crucial elements. Let's learn more about them, then. Passion refers to the drives that lead to romance, physical attraction, sexual consummation, and related phenomena in loving relationships. The passion component includes the sources of motivational and other forms of arousal within its purview that lead to the experience of passion in a loving relationship. Intimacy refers to feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness in loving relationships. It thus includes total acceptance of the loved one and ignites those feelings that give rise, practically, to the experience of warmth in a loving relationship. The physical and psychological need and desire to spend as muc...

The snake in the Garden of Eden: Married women lurking behind the lesbian scenes

25May

By Roberta MooreNo Comments

closeUp, Lifestyle

The snake in the Garden of Eden: Married women lurking behind the lesbian scenes

At first glance, you will notice a well dressed woman somewhat unsettled, leaning against the bar with a glass of wine. Though she finds herself within a female surrounding, her lack of the unexplainable floats above her head. We can immediately suss out that she’s a married woman. We all love to have a bite of the forbidden fruit but is this married woman the snake in the Garden of Eden ? I needed first insight into this world and decided to interview a friend who journeyed through this unfortunate experience. Gia is a passionate and caring individual who has a bomb of loving emotions waiting to explode inside her. She’s the type of woman who would put her coat over a puddle so that you wouldn’t have to skip on to the pavement. She’s been single for some time and it is not by choice b...

24May

By alcoachNo Comments

closeUp, Health

Love at first sight or oversight?

Some people believe in love at first sight because it's just what happened to them. What about you? From personal experience or by hearsay, you know what love at first sight is. You probably know how it feels when two "halves" meet and love happens. Nonetheless, you may not be aware of what dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and pheromones are, and how they affect your mood when you're in love. The former is the result of our pop and "romantic" (and cheesy) culture. The latter are chemistry and biology. When you start dating someone you know nothing about - but somehow you like and feel attracted to - your brain starts secreting a series of hormones and chemical substances that dramatically alter their natural balance all over your body. This is why you get euphoric, a bit anxious or em...

Watch the film – and Q&A – God’s Own Country

14May

By rebecca1 Comment

closeUp, Entertainment

Watch the film – and Q&A – God’s Own Country

It’s time for a watch – or rewatch – of 2017’s God’s Own Country – ready for an online Q&A on Sunday 17 May. If you haven’t yet seen 2017’s God’s Own Country, you really, really should; if you have – you will know exactly what I mean. Either way, now is the time for a watch or rewatch, as director Francis Lee and the two lead actors Josh O’Connor and Alec Secareanu are going to be chatting and answering questions live on Picturehouse Facebook and Youtube on Sunday 17 May, 8pm BST. The film is a wonderfully performed and impressively unsentimental story of love and longing in England’s Yorkshire hills. Young sheep farmer Johnny numbs his daily frustrations with binge drinking and casual sex, until the arrival of Romanian migrant worker Gheorghe for lambing season ignites an intens...

13May

By alcoachNo Comments

closeUp, Health

Friends: the best school to learn love

Before starting looking for a life-long partner, make sure you have real friends in your life and know what true friendship is. We, the LGBT+ people, suffered from homophobia since we were kids. This caused remarkable damages to our relationships with others since we had no real chance to be ourselves and relate to others with authenticity. Straight teenagers never feel ashamed or in need to hide their sexual orientation. We do instead, or at least we did in the past. Especially those born before 2000 did not have an easy life during puberty and adolescence. Back then, socialising and relating to others was crucial for our own healthy, correct emotional and psychological development. But somehow, we screwed it up. Most of us (LGBT+) were forced to pretend to be what we were not. At ...

10May

By alcoachNo Comments

closeUp, Lifestyle

True love lasts forever. Seriously?

Once upon a time, love would last a lifetime. Today there's room for more than just one love in a lifetime: divorce rates keep rising while marriage drops. Why? As I said, "once upon a time" couples would stay together forever. Yes, that was back in the Middle Ages, when only the luckiest people would get to turn 45 years of age as plague and starvation would kill you way before. At that time, aged 20 (or even earlier), you would get married and spend the other twenty years making babies and then die, yes, because there was no such thing as divorce. Today our life expectancy is way higher. We are aware that we can easily fall in love with someone or even hate that person; it only takes a moment. Just like any other thing in the world, love is born, grows, changes, dies, and turns into...